The Bachelorette Recap: Heart Went Whaboom (Season 13 Episode 1)

Though Nick Viall’s season of The Bachelor ended just a few short months ago, Bachelor Nation has been abuzz over the newest installment of The Bachelorette since before he handed out his final rose.

The reason? Rachel Lindsay.

Nick’s third place participant, and our newest bachelorette, is the leading lady we’ve all been waiting for — she’s mature, intelligent, and drop-dead gorgeous.

And as the first ever black bachelorette, her season could mark the beginning of a far more diverse cast of contestants for years to come.

So, now that Bachelor Nation has fallen head-over heals for Rachel, she’s ready to find a big love of her own.

The Bachelorette

The episode opens with Rachel at a photo shoot, where the mention of her “fans” makes her blush. “I’m not ready for this,” she claims. But her ease in front of the camera and beaming smile say otherwise.

We then cut to the Bachelor Mansion, where Chris Harrison takes his rightful position out front and introduces “the bachelorette that the whole country is talking about.” And for the first time, his words aren’t even an exaggeration.

In her own introduction package, the 31 year old attorney adorably refers to herself as “sassy yet classy.” She explains that, because she’s dedicated so much time and energy to her career, friendships, and family, other areas — namely, her love life — have been neglected.

That, as Harrison puts it, is where the show comes in. And after a few of Rachel’s friends from The Bachelor — whom she refers to as her “squad” — sit down with her in the mansion to share their advice and encouragement, Rachel’s journey officially begins.

The Men

Dressed in a backless white and shimmering gown, our bachelorette heads out onto the mansion’s driveway to await her suitors.

First out of the limo is Peter from Wisconsin. He hopes he can redeem his home state in Rachel’s mind — remember that Nick was also a cheese head.

Though this entrance is simple and sweet, it’s quickly overshadowed by the elaborate — and sometimes tacky — acts that follow. From a full marching band, to a child-sized doll, to an (undoubtedly dolphin-inspired) penguin costume, Rachel’s men clearly aim to make an impression.

Other stand-outs include Pretty Boy Pitbull Kenny King — or Kenny for short — a professional wrestler with a soft spot for his 10 year old daughter, Jack — a 31 year old lawyer whose mother passed away when he was in high school, and Josiah — a lawyer who went down a troubled path after his younger brother committed suicide, but who grew up to work for the same company that once granted him a second chance.

Will emerges from the limo as Steve Urkel, going so far as to trip and exclaim, “Did I do that?” And that’s not all — he then returns to the limo, performs a quick change, and exits again as himself (or perhaps as the suave Stefan Urquelle?).

This act certainly earned major points among Family Matters fans at home, and with Rachel, who thankfully understood the reference.

Fred walks up to Rachel with his grade school year book in hand. And after showing her his own 3rd grade photo, he flips to a page that includes — you guessed it — an 8th grade photo of Rachel Lindsay.

Apparently, Fred hasn’t seen Rachel in 15 years, but he thinks they have a real shot at an incredible love story. Rachel, on the other hand, remembers Fred as a “bad boy” who she had to discipline. Could he have grown up to be her true love, or will she find he’s just as “bad” as he was back then?

Either way, this story should be an interesting one!

Far less impressive is Alex, a self-proclaimed “meathead” who defies the stereotype by being a “big nerd” on the inside. Really! He likes to play with Rubik’s cubes and everything!

Then there’s Lucas, who goes by the name “Whaboom” and (as a tribute to said name?) likes to frequently shout “whaboom” at the top of his lungs. A true weirdo out for attention, we can only hope that Lucas’ time on The Bachelorette begins and ends with Night One.

The Cocktail Party

Once all of the men have arrived and made their first impressions, the cocktail party finally begins. And, speaking of first impressions, though Rachel sits down to chat with many seemingly charming suitors, only one can win her coveted First Impression Rose.

Because she was awarded Nick’s First Impression Rose last season, Rachel knows how important this decision can be, especially to the receiver.

In the end, it’s Bryan — the handsome Colombian chiropractor — who seals the deal. Though his Spanish-speaking entrance surely stood out, the kiss he planted on Rachel after their first conversation is what likely earned him the rose.

The other men are openly disappointed, as they question what Bryan might have said to win her over. Little do they know, it’s more a question of what he did…

After Bryan accepts, the pair share a second (somewhat aggressive ??) kiss and, with that, it’s time for Rachel to exit and prepare for the first rose ceremony of the season.

In the end, it’s Rob, Kyle, Blake K., Milton, Mohit, Grant, Jamey, and Jedidiah who are sent home (before they’ve even had a chance to unpack) while Lucas “Whaboom” receives the final rose of the night. Here’s hoping these poor guys have better luck at finding love back home!

What do you think of Rachel’s decisions? Will Whaboom continue his shenanigans for yet another week? Tune in next Monday at 8/7c on ABC to find out. And in the meantime, share your own first impressions in the comments below! 

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