Iron Fist Review: Thank Shou-Lao That’s Over (Season 1 Episodes 10-13)

Originally, in this stream of reviews, the season finale was to get its own dedicated bit of analysis, but after an underwhelming penultimate episode, I figured “why not lump?”

I like rooting for underdogs, so I desperately wanted to give Iron Fist a chance, despite its heavy critical and social baggage. But I soon realized that the cultural appropriation controversy, while still an issue, was not the reason many critics had dumped so resolutely all over this show.

Ultimately, Iron Fist is a mess of plot holes, slow pacing, bad acting, and poorly choreographed fight scenes that deserves every ounce of criticism thrown at it.

The exceptions include Jessica Henwick, Rosario Dawson, Sacha Dhawan, Ramon Rodriguez, and Jessica Stroup who all deserve much better than the material they were given, but they did the absolute best they could.

The final four episodes were especially enervating to watch, particularly after glimpsing what Iron Fist could have been in the previous three episodes.

On Iron Fist Season 1 Episode 10, “Black Tiger Steals Heart,” we wake up at Professor X’s school for gifted youngsters where Danny and Bakuto discuss the legacy of the Iron Fist and why Bakuto knew how to heal Colleen.

In an hour long conversation (don’t time it, just trust me), Bakuto shows Danny a tape of an Iron Fist from 1948 in action, wearing his iconic comic book spandex. In any other show, a music cue would happen here because, hey, this is a pretty big deal. Instead, it’s treated with the same sort of dull reaction that Jones’ limited acting range gives to every bit of information he’s discovered thus far.

Eventually, Danny finds Gao who tells him that this compound of mutants is actually a training facility for Hand babies. Gasp! Another dramatic music cue would have helped, but by now, I’m asking too much.

So he gets mad, again, throws another tantrum, again, and just when you think all is lost, enter Sacha Dhawan as Danny’s old battle buddy, Davos.

Ah, so he’s a good guy! Totally explains the ten minutes we watched him make a ninja throwing star out of aluminum foil. It all makes sense now.

On Iron Fist Season 1 Episode 11, “Lead Horse Back to Stable,”—written by Ian Stokes, a former writer on Teen Wolf and Warehouse 13 and ostensibly Iron Fist‘s best writer—Danny and Davos have escaped The Hand, courtesy of Colleen, who is now herself questioning her role in The Hand’s organization.

Colleen, don’t stress yourself too much. You fell in love with Danny after 3 days, so clearly your judgement has never been great. We still love you, you Pisces princess.

This is also the first episode (I repeat, in 11 episodes, this is the first) that we get some—admittedly low quality—flashbacks of Danny’s time in K’un-Lun and a glimpse of his battle with Shou-Lao the Undying, the dragon from whom Danny’s fist gets its iron.

A friggin’ dragon, guys.

Of course, Netflix doesn’t have the budget for an actual dragon, so we get a floating pair of red eyes, which when given everything else that’s happened this season, is probably one of the better FX Iron Fist has done.

While the dialogue tends to drag on this episode as well, it is made less tedious by the mellifluous delivery of Rosario Dawson and Sacha Dhawan, veteran actors who can make even the most stilted lines sing with both humor and nuance.

Thus, each scene with the two of them together is practically a master class in acting compared to every—

Oh, wow. I forgot about the Meachums. They do some stuff this episode, too. And the previous episode, but really, does anybody care anymore?

Back to Claire. Claire and Davos talk a bit about K’un-Lun and why Davos sorta kinda deserved to be the Iron Fist over Danny (trust, girl, we all agree) while giving us a glimpse of the burning anger and envy that reside within.

The episode ends with a beautiful moment that’s far too self-aware for the show Iron Fist has given us thus far. In the rain, Danny encounters a distraught Colleen, who finally sees the truth about her surrogate family. While the lovers fight then embrace in a scene stolen directly from this episode of Angel, Davos looks on, jealous.

Bitch, where is that show? I’d pay money to watch a series about a hero, her man, and that man’s possibly-psychotic sidekick with the unrequited crush.

Iron Fist Season 1 Episode 12, “Bar the Big Boss,” the episode that usually sets the cliffhangers for the season finale, is so uneventful, I only have a half page of notes. At one point, I literally got angry at how much dialogue is going on without any actual information.

One egregious example is Danny’s loss of chi or whatever. On episode 11, he loses access to his iron fist because he’s… angry or something, but after thinking real hard, he gets it back, but then he loses it again and despite the heavy, heavy dialogue, we’re never told why.

It’s a lot to ask the audience to even stick around this long, but then to require them to make their own narrative leaps is just disrespectful.

We do get a sword fight in the rain which is capital-G Glorious, but contrary to almost every other scene in this entire series, runs entirely too short.

On Iron Fist Season 1 Episode 13, “Dragon Plays With Fire,” the showdown to end all showdowns begins atop the Rand building. If you actually believe that this is going to be a real emotionally cathartic boss battle, I have a bridge to K’un-Lun I can sell you.

What could have been the resolution of a season’s worth of conflict instead because a morass of character’s intentions. Danny’s goals in returning to New York were to stop The Hand, then he figured killing Madame Gao would be enough, then he figured killing Bakuto would be just as okay, and now he has to kill Harold because Harold was responsible all along?

And so, Danny and Harold fight on the roof of the Rand building for no reason than because it looks cool.

There’s nothing on the roof that Harold needs, no machine or computer server that will destroy New York or launch his international drug empire that Danny must stop before it’s too late. They are just on the roof arguing about family very, very loudly. Ward already has the proof they need to clear Danny’s name, Colleen is safe, Claire is safe, Joy is safe.

The stakes are literally so low that if Danny were to walk away from this fight, we’d still be in the same situation.

Which is watching this guy try to figure stuff out.

Mercifully, Ward finishes this unnecessary drama and everyone goes back to their business, complete with two new headshots of Ward and Danny hanging in the lobby (which is confusing because isn’t Joy the CEO???)

Of course, no season finale would be complete without a last-minute cliffhanger. It turns out Joy’s picture isn’t in the lobby because she’s conspiring with Davos to kill Danny even though she literally has no reason to hate Danny??? Like, he didn’t do anything to her???

Meanwhile, Danny and Colleen traverse the Himalayas wearing 3 layers like a couple weekending in Aspen and discover dead bodies where the doorway to K’un-Lun should be. The season ends with—and this is great, folks—a dramatic zoom-in of Danny’s glowing fist.

Y’aaaall, I can’t. I cannot. I am physically incapable of can.

Y’all zoomed in on homeboy’s fist and thought that was supposed to be compelling television? Boy, bye.

Focusing the Glow

Episode 10 – 3 stars

• Bakuto’s goal is to help those marginalized by society to which Danny replies, “I’m a billionaire.” A better show would’ve hung a lampshade here.
• Harold hiding poor gay Kyle behind a drink cart is a perfect representation of this show as a whole.
• “We have to tell him.” Are you guys Hand members? You’re all wearing black and red, so, like…
• The “G” in “Madame Gao” stands for “gangsta.”
• “The Hand are murders and killers!” Who wrote this?
• It must be hella awkward to find out your girlfriend is your sworn enemy then still have to share a room with her.
• Why is the computer room unguarded? Y’all was looking to be hacked.
• Davos: “You are the worst Iron Fist ever.” Booooooyyyyyyy… You said it, not me. I mean, I said it, but I’m talking to nobody most of the time.
• All this embezzling that everyone is doing at Rand, it’s a genuine wonder how they ever make a profit.
• The writers seem to overestimate how much us normal folk care about Wall Street happenings.
• Honestly, go the f*ck away, Meachums. God.
• Did… did Colleen walk back? How far is this compound?

Episode 11 – 3.5 stars

• Davos is totally gay for Danny. That’s not an observation so much as a prayer.
• (Claire staples Danny twice) Danny: “That was two!” Claire: “Mm.”
• Claire has Cafe Bustelo on her counter!
• Davos: “I don’t know who Pete is.” (Hahaha. The delivery!)
• Claire: “Did you think about trying a different name for the group? Like The Ear or The Arm?” (I had to pause because I was laughing so hard. Claire, don’t leave.)
• Davos: “It’s… chewy.” (These two need their own episode. Claire teaching Davos about New York.)
• Henchman: “That’s Gary. He helped with the Miami thing.” (Haha, what?)
• Davos: “Do you have a driver’s license?” Danny: “No, but it’s different. I’m rich.” (Whelp.)
• As Davos stares at Colleen and Danny in the rain, I once again utter my prayer.

Episode 12 – 2 stars

• I completely forgot Ward existed. Is that awful?
• How does Joy get blood all over her face but not a single drop on her white pants?
• Oh, wow. I thought at the very least Joy was safe from injury. Although, she is a woman on a comic book show, so she was bound to be refrigerated at some point.
• I take back what I said earlier; a very white Danny standing center screen in an elevator full of colored people is the perfect representation of this show as a whole.
• This sword fight in the rain is everything I am living fo—aaaand it’s over.
• Ward, go wash your g*ddamn hands before filling out paperwork, are you kidding me?
• Rather than accepting the warning from Ward to run, Danny squints at it, shows it to Colleen, then texts back. He deserves to get killed, tbh.

Episode 13 – 2 stars

• We still have no idea why this glass coffin exists.
• Jeri Hogarth makes me excited for Jessica Jones again.
• It really bothered me that Colleen just threw that plastic bag on the ground. I know you’re on the lam, but we can’t descend to utter lawlessness! Find a trash can!
• Stan Lee sighting!
• Gao: “I have never lied to him. Can you say the same?” Boop!
• Danny, Colleen, and Claire in the alley is probably the lengthiest scene where nothing happens before Claire, probably sensing that there’s too much talking going on, claps her hands and brings us back to the point: the tablet.
• Danny punching through a window is without a doubt the cheesiest special FX I have ever…
• Danny, you kicked Harold, but you didn’t… take the gun?? Is you dumb??
• Guys, after 12 episodes, I think it’s safe to say that no one knows what they’re doing here.
• Claire tells Danny and Colleen that they both need help, then bounces. And if anyone knows their limits when it comes to helping psychologically damaged heroes, it’s Claire.
• When did Davos even meet Joy? And does Joy or Davos even know Gao is sitting there? Why is any of this happening??

Thus ends the first season of Iron Fist, Marvel’s worst television show to date. My hopes and prayers should the show be renewed for another season: 1) that Finn Jones actually go to the Himalayas to get acting lessons, 2) that the writers thoroughly study each and every bad review, fix the mistakes, and learn how to create a damn character arc, and 3) that Scott Buck never return to the set again.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to start AMC’s Into The Badlands.

What did you think of this block of Iron Fist? Did you find some good moments that make you want to stream the joy all over again? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!

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Iron Fist is currently streaming on Netflix.

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