The Conners Review: CPAPs, Hickeys and Biscuits (Season 2 Episode 19)

Sometimes it is hard to decide whether to evaluate a sitcom’s success on its jokes or its progression of the story. The Conners Season 2 Episode 19, “CPAPs, Hickeys and Biscuits,” is one such episode. 

If we are looking at whether or not the jokes landed, then we could easily hand this episode five stars. However, if we are looking at it singularly from a story standpoint, it rates about two-and-a-half. This means that combined, “CPAPs, Hickeys and Biscuits” barely succeeds as a winning episode.

With the opening sequence, we get to see Dan playing poker with his buddies. History has shown that these scenes are always a win in the funny column but rarely move the story forward. 

This is a shining moment for Ed Jr. and DJ to have a familiar familial back and forth. It is both funny and dissatisfying.

This comfortableness and ease at which DJ lands a punchline make us really hope for more from him. Time and time again, DJ is used as merely a punchline or an example. He is an “original” Conner member and yet he gets less airtime than Baby Beverly Rose. 

DJ has always been a fun and unique perspective for the family. As the youngest child for a good chunk of his life, he has been able to move through situations without being noticed and give an unbiased viewpoint on the dramas at hand.

Unfortunately, ever since this show’s inception, he has been relegated to the background and used as a token joke to make us laugh — he is the character made out to be a fool. DJ is worth so much more than that and yet, the show continually ignores him. 

This back and forth, unfortunately, doesn’t really shine a light on Michael Fishman’s abilities; instead, it serves to show the world just how successful Noel Fisher is as a comedy actor. 

Which is all fine and well — no arguments here (I will be the first to tell you how great Fisher is) — but, as an original cast member, Fishman deserves better. 

This leads us into Darlene and Ben’s hijinks of the night. When Darlene gets arrested — for refusing to sign a traffic ticket of all things — she leaves Ben in charge, which ends up blowing up in their faces. 

I will say the jokes that Becky and Harris throw at her once she returns from jail are comedic gold. It really drives home just how close these guys have all become in their two years living together under one roof. 

Harris is really loosening up the longer she spends time with her family and realizes that she is not alone in the world. And Becky has really learned to respect and lean on her sister more than ever before.

The funniest part of this whole situation isn’t even the jail bit, it’s Mark’s deadpan delivery of the Twilight joke. This kid has always been the hidden gem of the Conner family, but “CPAPs, Hickeys and Biscuits” serves to further strengthen his title as the funniest family member.

While these jokes are fantastic, make us smile, and help us feel less alone during this interesting time, they shouldn’t be the whole scene. While we do get “drama” between Darlene and Ben, it’s much of the same and I personally am getting sick of it.

How many times are Darlene and Ben going to have some form of argument or standstill over what Ben’s role is in Darlene’s life? Yes, we understand that Darlene has some relationship hang-ups, but isn’t it time she cast those aside? 

Clearly, she trusts Ben enough to try and have a baby with him. So, why can’t she trust him to further their relationship by taking the next step and living together? 

Yes, the episode ends with them finally crossing that hurdle, but it never should have been a hurdle at this point in the game. It’s been clear for weeks that Ben is a perfect match to Darlene’s cynical, snarky demeanor and also a great step-dad to her kids. 

Just let Ben be their father figure already. That is all.

Finally, one of the cutest scenes of the night is courtesy of Dan and Louise and his CPAP machine. To be quite honest, their whole exchange of “hidden bedtime routines” warms our hearts to their core. 

Dan has desperately needed this kind of love and acceptance in his life since Roseanne passed and now he has it. Louise doesn’t judge him; instead, she tries to offer up her own imperfections as a way of supporting him. 

Knowing that Louise is there to catch Dan no matter when he falls is going to come into play heavily with the news that the bank is foreclosing on the house. This family has always lived in that house and it’s going to be really hard to say goodbye to it.

I can foresee the season finale being a very emotional attempt at saving their home. It’ll be a fantastic way to end the season by bringing it back to the basics of family.

 

What did you think of this episode of The Conners? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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The Conners Season Finale airs Tuesday, May 5th at 8/7c on ABC.

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