Versailles Review: Of Gods and Men (Season 3 Episode 8)

Versailles Season 3 Episode 8, “Of Gods and Men,” primarily deals with all the fall out from the shocking Man in the Iron Mask revelation, as Louis pouts, Phillippe overcompensates and Bontemps hovers anxiously in the background.

To be fair, there was never going to be a version of the Man in the Iron Mask story on this show that wasn’t the most extra, complicated, ridiculous version possible.

Versailles isn’t a show that plays the actual proven beats of history straight; it’s certainly not going to suddenly discover restraint with one of the most famous French mysteries of all time.

So, no one should be surprised that the masked man declares himself the father of both Louis and Phillippe.

Apparently the king knew and encouraged his wife seeking some help making heirs elsewhere, since they’d gone multiple decades without doing so. And everyone was cool with it – or at least they were until France had an heir and a spare.

Then Masked Man became a liability, and subsequently, a prisoner.

Louis, initially, takes this better than you might expect, moping about his loss of status, having and distancing himself from everyone at court, including his brother and Madame de Maintenon.

As we’ve seen this season, Louis has spent his entire life hearing about how he’s meant to rule, how he’s chosen by God, how he’s literally superior to everyone around him.

Finding out that he’s actually the illegitimate son of a nobody has to be a blow.

It’s Bontemps who ultimately talks him down from the proverbial ledge, with a heartfelt reminder that, in him, Louis has always had the dad he needed, no matter who his actual father was.

In short: Bontemps really doesn’t get enough credit for being the best person on this show.

Not only has he been cleaning up — and covering up — Louis’ messes for his entire life, he’s had to handle the care and feeding of a man who could literally bring down the French monarchy. And all while serving as the entire emotional support system for its current king.

Whatever Bontemps is being paid, it is not enough, is what I’m saying.

Of course, despite Bontemps’ best pep talk, Louis still needs some hard and fast proof that his reign — and his life, come to that — is the will of God. So he throws himself off a cliff into a river.

There’s the ridiculously dramatic Louis we know and love.

In the end, this is one of those cliffhangers that doesn’t matter at all, since we all know that Louis XIV did not commit suicide by cliff jumping. But as a symbol of just how extra the king can be? You kind of can’t beat it.

Elsewhere, Phillippe is reacting to the revelation that everything he’s known in his life to date has been a lie by behaving as though its Christmas morning. For some reason, he’s super pumped about having a new secret dad, and since the show doesn’t bother to explain this to us, you can pretty much make up your own reasons why.

But, he basically spends the entire episode overcompensating, bringing the Masked Man food, helping him shave, and having heart to hearts about life.

Phillippe has been something of a mystery to us this season, so this sudden twist is just another in a long line of actions that don’t entirely make sense. What is it that he’s looking for here?

It’s also kind of strange that Phillippe doesn’t seem to be having the same crisis of self his brother is. Perhaps it’s because he always knew he would never be king, therefore he wasn’t as obsessed with the divinity of their lineage.

But it does seem like he should maybe be more freaked out about this than he is. Instead, he decides to become son of the year? Okay, show.

The other thing that’s kind of bizarre about this situation is that Louis and Phillippe never really talk about all of this.

Sure, they discuss what’s to be done with New Dad. Louis waffles about killing him, since he’s a threat as long as he’s alive and the Catholic Church knows about his existence.

Phillippe argues that he should be sent to the colonies and given a comfortable option to spend out the rest of his days. He insists the not-quite-actually Bourbon boys owe it to their newfound father.

But the two men never actually discuss, in depth, what the disintegration of everything they’ve known up until this point means. For their sense of selves, for their futures, even for their memories of what’s gone before.

Maybe it all doesn’t matter so much to Phillippe, who has often seemed to view his royal responsibilities as a burden as much as anything else. But that’s obviously not true for Louis, who has built his sense of self entirely around the divinity of his own lineage.

And maybe that’s something they should talk about.

Stray Thoughts and Observations

• Liselotte’s super petty takedown of Madame de Maintenon over the Portugese princess she’s hoping to get Louis to marry? Priceless.
• It’s a shame that Listelotte hasn’t really had a real narrative arc this season — we haven’t seen her react much to the epic change in her husband’s personality or do much of anything besides snark with the Chevalier.
• Drama among the peasantry: Shoe maker Guillam rats out his sister and her friends who are printing posters denouncing the king and his salt tax. People literally throw rocks at him for this after Fabien and the musketeers raid the local printing press, which is kind of entertaining, but I still don’t care about any of these people, so whatever.
• Honestly, I think I’m just annoyed that we’re wasting time that could go to characters like Liselotte on these people. Sheesh.

What did you think of this episode of Versailles? Share your thoughts in the comments below!

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Versailles airs Saturdays at 10pm on Ovation.

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