Riverdale Review: Chapter Nineteen: Death Proof (Season 2 Episode 6)

Betty turns the tables on the Black Hood and mends fences with both Jughead and Veronica — but Riverdale’s resident serial killer isn’t playing around.

On Riverdale Season 2 Episode 6, “Death Proof,” much of the focus is on the still-brewing North-South rivalry, which seems to be reaching a peak now, thanks to good ol’ Archiekins.

“Death Proof” is definitely not as good an episode as the last several installments of this season, but there are more than a few things I appreciate about it.

For one, I like the fact that “Tughead” boils down to a fake-out, subverting expectations of this turning into a cliché love triangle and getting drawn out unnecessarily. I particularly love that it’s Toni who shuts it down. Sure, they might’ve enjoyed some “PG-13” groping after the kiss that ended Riverdale Season 2 Episode 5, but Toni is well aware that Jug isn’t remotely over Betty. And she’s not willing to be a rebound.

That’s enough for Toni to win a few points back in my book — though I’m not particularly thrilled about how they introduced her bisexuality, essentially shoehorning it into the conversation rather than just making it a casual statement of fact.

With that in mind, I (like many other fans) am fully hoping for a Toni-Cheryl connection now that Tughead is officially off the menu. Cheryl hasn’t expressed any interest in women that we’ve seen yet, but she’s also never formed any meaningful connection with any male character on the show.

So in my mind, it’s very possible that Cheryl is queer. And because this show is clearly not interested in making Kevin/Moose happen anytime soon (damn you, show!), we are well overdue for another LGBT ship.

The episode manages to overlap the Black Hood storyline and the Southside/Northside storyline nicely, with the introduction (and quick offing of) the Sugar Man, the Jingle Jangle supplier.

(Will I ever not laugh aloud just typing out that drug name? Probably not.)

As usual, the Betty/Black Hood portions of “Death Proof” are infinitely more interesting and engaging than what the boys get up to. I have so many issues with the drag race storyline, I’m not even sure where to begin.

For one thing, why was FP’s suggestion for Archie and Jughead, two teens without drivers licenses, to challenge to Ghoulies (known for their love of “souped up cars”) to a race? How could he possibly have thought that would end well?

And as expected, it didn’t end well.

In theory, everything that happens makes sense. I would 100% have expected Alice Cooper to gather the teens and their parents to confront them with the drug use at Nick’s party. It’s also logical that the Mayor, particularly struck by her own daughter’s partaking in the JJ, would react swiftly with a massive drug raid, landing Ghoulies and Serpents alike in jail. After all, to Northsiders, there is no difference between the two factions.

Accordingly, it makes sense for Tall Boy to want to merge the two gangs, to consolidate their resistance against Northside.

It just seems like the show really wanted to do a hybrid Grease/Fast and the Furious homage and didn’t want to put a lot of thought into the mechanics of it.

But thanks to Archie’s interference in calling the cops and getting the Ghoulies’ leader Malachi tossed into jail, things are so much worse. At this point, I am legitimately confused about whether we’re really supposed to like Archie’s noble nature or just find him incredibly naive and annoying. Personally, I’m in the latter camp. And after this latest stunt, it seems like Jug is too.

On the Betty side of things, her naming of Nick St. Clair as the Hood’s new victim — a moment I thought was badass and cool AF — turns out to have been a false alarm. It’s kind of stupid that the killer arbitrarily decides that Nick isn’t an eligible victim because he isn’t a “Riverdale son” because neither was Ms. Grundy, duh.

Regardless, naming Nick serves the purpose of darkening Betty in the Hood’s eyes, which is exactly what he wanted all along. His next mission for her, to find out the identity of the Sugar Man, is not very interesting at all. But she does it dutifully anyway (with help from V, who she thankfully came clean to), and it leads to a moderately entertaining twist — that the Sugar Man is Jug’s Southside teacher/Red & Black mentor.

I say “moderately entertaining” because this twist tries to land as if we have had any emotional investment in this dude. I’m calling him “this dude” because I honestly can’t even remember his name or be bothered to google it. Because he’s dead anyway, at the hands of the Black Hood while locked away in jail, so who even cares?

That said, the rather silly and extremely abbreviated “Who is Sugar Man?” plot is good for a few things.

For one, it gives us the truly epic (and wonderfully delivered) moment where Betty gets to spookily turn it around on the killer, creepily asking him if he can feel her breathing down his neck and warning him that she will catch him. It’s slightly delusional that Betty, a teen, can take down a grown-ass killer with a gun, but I like Betty vs. Black Hood a whole heck of a lot more than Archie vs. Black Hood, so I’ll take it gladly.

The second thing the Sugar Man story provides is the opportunity for some slight growth in the Cheryl-Penelope relationship.

Cheryl grilling her mom about the Sugar Man leads to Penelope’s breakdown over the events she feels led to Jason’s death. This seems to give her some sort of revelation about what type of mom she should be, because by the end of the hour, she goes from denying that anything even happened to Cheryl at Nick’s hands and willingly taking hush money to silence her assaulted daughter to burning said check in the fire.

Penelope isn’t going to be winning any Mom of the Year awards anytime soon, but it’s something.

And speaking of the St. Clair family — perhaps my favorite subplot of the episode is, one again, involving the Lodge family and their strange, complex, ever-changing dynamic.

Hermione and Hiram may be ruthless and manipulative, but one thing is clear and true: they have unwavering love for and dedication to their daughter (despite the fact that they seemingly have no qualms lying to her).

Mark Consuelos is excellent in the moment that he realizes Nick threatened to rape Veronica before attacking Cheryl. It’s like a switch flips in him, and I truly believe that protecting her is immediately more important to him than any business proposition. Hiram clearly wants to flat out kill the boy, but Hermione visibly tempers his bloodthirstiness. In the end, they settle for merely maiming him, in a “coincidental car crash” they learn about near the end of the episode.

The chilly way Hiram and Hermione react to the “news” is perfect, but what’s really interesting is Veronica’s take on it and her implicit approval of her parents obviously arranging the accident in secret: “Karma’s a bitch.”

We’ve already seen Betty begin to go dark, but is Veronica set to take a page from her parents’ shady and morally grey handbook? I, for one, can’t wait to find out.

Stray thoughts:

• So, Betty and Jughead are back together. That’s cool, I guess, even though it seems to have happened just a little too easily.
• I don’t care for the drag race storyline, but I live for Cheryl as the race girl. Every time from her look to her “Not this time, Cha Cha” quip is perfect.
• Reggie is slowly but surely growing on me, and I like that Riverdale is taking the time to slowly flesh out the flirty vibes between him and Josie. They both deserve something more interesting to do!
• Speaking of Josie: her mom alludes to the fact that Josie’s estranged (and terrible) dad struggled with drug addiction. I’m so here for a meaty storyline like that for Josie.
• Betty gives Polly the heads up to disappear for a while, aka head over to Once Upon a Time for a turn as Zelena’a grown-up daughter Robin.

What did you think of this episode of Riverdale? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!

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Riverdale airs Wednesdays at 8/7c on The CW.

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