Quantico, Arrow, and Once Upon a Time: Not So Hidden Lairs and Other TV Gaffes

Welcome back to another segment of moments that don’t make sense on TV!, this time with return appearances from shows like The Flash, Arrow and Once Upon A Time, as well as new offenders like Blindspot, Heroes Reborn and Quantico. We’re smart people and no matter how much kick-ass, heart stopping, feels inducing moments you give us, we notice when things just don’t add up.

So, without more delay, here are our Top 6 head-scratching moments of the week:

Arthur and his never ending dust from Avalon, Once Upon a Time

Let’s start off with this: Arthur is shady. Correction, shady is for when we have doubts. Arthur is PURE EVIL! He’s got the whole kingdom under his thumb because of a magic vial of dust. One vial of dust. Not three, not seven, just one. Somehow he manages to use this one vial on his wife, the whole kingdom, and have a little something to spare for the Charmings. (Or more than a little something, for it looks like he STILL has some left). Either the vial has a never ending spell that magically refills it, or Arthur was very, very frugal and he lucked out when sprinkling his magic dust all over the kingdom. The winds must have been in his favor.

Lucky bastard.

Simon is either Harry Potter or the FBI is really, really bad at it’s job, Quantico

When the FBI says it has you surrounded, I assume they mean they actually have you surrounded and no matter what you do you can’t possibly get out of the place you’re hiding in because, well, because they’re the FBI and they know what they’re doing. The FBI brings out the big guns, after all. Tons of extras. Enough people to apprehend the terrorist and save the day! Right? Right? So why is it that when the FBI says they have Alex and Simon surrounded he still manages to get them out of there? Is he magical? Did he just apparate them away? Or is the FBI truly so incompetent?

Wait. Don’t answer that.

Jane’s perfect makeup, eyebrows & hair. I thought she lost her memory?, Blindspot

Jane doesn’t remember who she is. She doesn’t remember where she’s from or how she got to the place she is now, covered in tattoos galore. To recap, Jane knows nothing. Except, apparently, how to do her eyebrows. Maybe you haven’t noticed it before, but we have. Take a look next time you watch an episode – they’re perfect dark arches that frame her beautiful face. And let’s not forget about hair and makeup. You don’t suddenly wake up like that! Out of everything that Jane lost, does she still remember how to look beautiful?

The answer is yes. Thank you memory.

Leaving the rift to Earth 2 open. Wave at Wells ladies and gents! The Flash

*deep breath* It’s a portal that connects Earth 1 to Earth 2. A PORTAL. It’s also one of the ways the villain has been using to send bad guys to kill Barry. IT’S A DANGER ZONE! And no one thought to close it off when not in use? (We’re not sure they even thought of a way to turn it off, to be honest). No one thought to set alarms or a guard since they weren’t going to, you know, close it? Either Team Flash is still harboring the delusion that their security actually works (And with Jay present, they really, really shouldn’t), or they need a reality check. Fast. Someone really needs to use their “loud voice” and knock some sense into these guys. (Hello, Felicity? Oliver? Anyone from Team Arrow, really?)

Renautas builds a super-secret prison and puts their logo on it, Heroes Reborn

We feel like ALL of Heroes Reborn deserves to be on this list, because the whole thing is silly, poorly-plotted and boring as hell, but the part where Renautas goes to all the trouble of building a hidden prison INSIDE a video-game to trap the Master of Time and Space (You might as well call him Hiro, we all know who you’re talking about) and THEN puts their logo on it deserves a special gold star. Secret prisons don’t usually have identifying marks on them.

Double Down making it down into the Arrow lair, Arrow

JR Bourne, you are beautiful and your presence was wholly welcome in this week’s episode of Arrow. In fact, can you appear in The Flash next? We wouldn’t mind that. Your abilities are on point, after all, and your evil persona makes us want to see you fail (okay, that’s a lie, we kind of want you to win). Now, we know you’re obviously a very skilled meta-human, but …eh …how did you get into the lair? Felicity and Curtis jump into the Palmer Tech elevator and go down to the supposedly secret lair that was apparently always there, under the building. And yet YOU manage to get there around the same time they do. How did you find the door? How did you even know where to go? And, while we’re at it, let us commend you for staying in tip-top physical shape. For someone who presumably ran down the stairs, you didn’t even look out of breath! It’s not like you’re some superhuman beast who changes during the full moon and ….nope. Wrong show.

Agree? Disagree? Have another moment that stretched the limits of your credibility? Did a show ask you to wave common sense bye-bye? Share with us in the comments section below!

(This post is brought to you by Lyra and Lizzie.)