Newlyweds Season 1 Episode 3 Review: One Romantic Breakfast, One Side of Teenage Angst

On Newlyweds Season 1 Episode 3, “We’ll Never Have Paris,” our besotted couple has many ideas for the perfect honeymoon, but they’re too busy to go on any of them.

They reluctantly agree to wait, instead opting to bring the world home: baguettes for breakfast, a couples spa treatment, and candlelight sushi. Romantic, right? Yes, but only for a few minutes before Poppy arrives in foods of tears over her latest breakup.

 Jeanie agrees to cut the massage early to comfort her only to find that Claudia in their bedroom, taking the entire treatment for herself. They work out a plan: James will offer advice to a distraught Poppy and Jeanie will try to persuade Claudia to leave.

This goes exactly how you’d expect at first. But eventually James manages to convince Poppy that her on-again, off-again beau should be permanently off, and, even more astoundingly, Jeanie and Claudia actually…bond? (Or whatever Claudia is capable of.)

While the mini-moon is arguably ruined, the newlyweds decide to call it a wedding reception instead. They join the party and even manage to get some couples time to themselves that evening—including Arvin playing a mime, of course.

As rushed as this romance has been, I’m still happy to get to an episode where the things James and Jeanie face don’t immediately make them doubt whether they should stay together at all. As Poppy shows, “will they or won’t they” can only last so long.

Besides, what’s the point of having all these characters around if we aren’t going to use them? I’m actually not sure anyone fits the “straight man” trope on this show, but with Claudia and Arvin around, Jeanie and James may be as close as we get.

The mini-moon idea is indeed very sweet before everything goes south, and they even manage to come up with a somewhat rational plan then. Sure, handling their own issues would make a lot more sense, but this is a sitcom, after all.

James does a good a job handling typical teenage heartbreak as any middle-aged many who speaks in academic metaphors probably could. And while it makes absolutely no sense that Jeanie would even tolerate Claudia, I kind of like them together.

Of course, all that still requires considerable suspension of disbelief. Claudia joining Jeanie when it gives her the chance to offer both compliments and few jabs? I can see it. Claudia joining others in cheering Jeanie kissing her ex-husband? Not so much.

It does seem that, at least for now, all these people are going to spend most of their time within the same walls. Do you think they’ll find a way to continue to bomb, or are we all just waiting for other shoe of these very dubious circumstances to drop?

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Newlyweds airs Fridays at 8:30/7:30C on NBC. 

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