The Conners Review: Two Proposals, a Homecoming and a Bear (Season 3 Episode 20)

The Conner family is hearing wedding bells in their future for one of their main couples. On The Conners Season 3 Episode 20, “Two Proposals, a Homecoming and a Bear” the family deals with the fallout of many major relationship moments.

When Dan decides to pop the question to Louise both the family and the audience cheers in excitement. It’s a moment that has been a long time coming and well deserved. 

Of all the couples on this show, Dan and Louise are my favorite. In fact, they are everyone’s favorite couple. 

Louise just really knows how to handle all of Dan’s complexities. They’ve been through it all during the course of their courtship; from past ghosts to COVID to careers. 

It is nice to see Louise finally put her guard down and admit to Dan that she needs him on an intimate level. This is something we don’t really get to see with her because, as the family puts it, she’s very “rock’n’roll.”

Sagal has always been really good at playing those tough nut characters and Louise is no different. She has that ability to really drive home that Louise is loving, but guarded by past experiences. 

Dan and Louise work perfectly together because they are exactly the kind of person the other needs. Dan needs someone who doesn’t pull any punches and Louise needs someone who will silently support her through everything but also not let her run away.

While their engagement is worth celebrating it’s even more important that we look at the crumbling of Ben and Darlene.

Darlene may think she wants to marry Ben, but anyone with half a brain can see that she’s doing it in order to hold onto a relationship that is on its way out. It’s disappointing that Ben has to break her heart in order for her to see that her motivations weren’t correct. 

Honestly, Ben’s outburst at Darlene over her proposal solidifies my disdain for the direction his development has taken this season. It’s true that the pandemic is hard on everyone, but it’s been especially taxing on Ben and Darlene as a couple and individuals. 

Lately, he’s been dismissive of Darlene’s growth needs and has been asking her to be completely honest with him at every turn. While that is reasonable to expect in a relationship it’s a bit hypocritical of him considering his anger at Darlene.

If he’s asking her to be completely honest with him shouldn’t she be afforded the same in return? I’m not saying that all of Darlene’s actions and choices are excusable, but Ben’s anger at her is misplaced.

Maybe if he had been honest with her as they went along this season they wouldn’t have reached the moment where he’s all but given up on them together. If they’d both been completely honest with one another, Darlene wouldn’t be left holding a broken heart and a ring box. 

The proposal is a step they clearly weren’t ready for and it’s unfortunate that Darlene couldn’t see that or that Becky couldn’t warn her. It’s as if the whole family loves Ben so much they have been blind to the reality of the relationship. 

Ben criticizes Darlene for having a mid-life crisis that affects them both but fails to forget his own earlier on in the pandemic. He is the one who dropped a steady job in order to start a podcast and expected Darlene to pay the full share of the bills.

Honestly, if The Conners had decided to be more clear about Ben’s actions and motivations being a result of losing his father then maybe his character would be redeemable. However, at this point, I’ve lost all faith in him as a decent and understanding human being. 

Ben and Darlene haven’t officially called it quits, but I hope they do. Darlene deserves to be with someone who will fight for her and understand her desire to be her own person from time to time. 

This season has been full of ups and downs, but it seems that things are really starting to turn around for this family. Darlene may be devastated right now, but Becky and Jackie are making strides with the restaurant and DJ finally gets his wife back for good. 

All in all, the Conner family is staring down the long dark tunnel to the sun on the other side. 

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The Conners will return in the fall for Season 4 on ABC.

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