Shameless: The Underlying Hope of Mickey Milkovich

From his first moments on screen, Mickey Milkovich demands attention and respect. His swagger and confidence are captivating for all who watch him. However, it soon becomes apparent that these are just walls masking a deeper secret.

The minute his trauma is revealed, Mickey Milkovich becomes a character for the voiceless amongst the fans of Shameless.

His trauma is a story worth following and latching onto because it shows that men can hurt too and love can help us heal. By following Mickey’s story, and by extension Ian’s, we are allowing ourselves to see tragedy and trauma turn into love and acceptance. 

After he hooks up with Ian for the first time, his fear is all over his face at the sight of his father. He clenches his hands ready for a fight. That is when fans start to see just how terrifying and demoralizing his relationship with his father is. 

Mickey has grown up surrounded by Neo-Nazi beliefs and ideals, which means his homosexuality has no place in their home. Terry Milkovich engrains violence and dominance as the way to maintain order within their world. There is no time or place for such nonsense as love or even being “abnormal” in any way in that home.

If Mickey doesn’t run drugs or guns with his father, he isn’t “one of the guys.” Any behavior that is out of line with how Terry lives could get him beaten up or worse. 

Therefore, Mickey has to hide who he really is, taking on this tough guy persona. It may seem like he’s taking the cowardly approach, but this is his reality. That makes it the bravest thing anyone has ever done. 

Instead of being terrified to even act on his feelings, he goes full steam ahead, but with limitations. Mickey uses his apathy about Ian to protect himself from being discovered — but also to protect Ian from being harmed by Terry Milkovich. 

For Mickey, he is afraid to fully commit, at first, because he knows it will only get Ian hurt. Mickey is loyal to a fault to his father, but he also loves Ian — something which remains in conflict within him for the first few seasons of Shameless.

He cares about Ian, but he doesn’t know how to reconcile that with what he knows to be true about his father. Mickey knows if his father ever discovers his relationship with Ian they will both be killed. So, he does what he can to protect them both.

It’s a complex, yet beautiful story of love being presented as fear. With Mickey, we get to see a man who wants so badly to be with Ian that he is willing to take a few risks to gain that little nugget of happiness.

A prime example of this is when he runs back into the van to give Ian a kiss because Ian challenges him to face his fear of intimacy. Mickey knows anyone could see him, but he risks it all because the thought of not having him is much more traumatic. 

It is the first time, Mickey has put aside his fear of his father in order to have something he really wants. It shows that things are really starting to shift in Mickey’s perspective about love and attachment.

The most devastating moment for Mickey’s character is when his father does finally catch them together. It is one of those TV moments that fans skip over during subsequent rewatches because of the upsetting content. 

Up until Shameless Season 3 Episode 6, “Cascading Failures,” everyone thinks that the worst thing Terry can do to Mickey is to beat the crap out of him. However, this episode shows the world just how evil Terry really is.

Terry catches Ian and Mickey and physically tears them apart by pistol-whipping his son. Then he calls in a Russian sex worker, while Ian is forced to watch.

Because of this, Mickey shuts down and breaks off any emotions he may have been starting to show. He is no longer willing to be open to happiness, let alone be with Ian. 

His father breaks a part of Mickey that can never be brought back. He manages to bring Mickey back to his side and create a loyal, obedient son — not the carefree gay man Mickey deserves to be.

It isn’t often that men are shown as being victims of rape. It’s even more uncommon that a gay man is raped by a woman. Mickey doesn’t talk about it or even allow himself to outwardly feel it because his father has taught him that feelings are weakness.

There are so many layers to how this storyline breaks ground and solidifies Mickey as a character who can provide comfort and representation. 

Two kids on the Southside of Chicago definitely don’t have access to the mental health assistance that they deserve. Despite this, Mickey manages to find his own coping mechanisms to deal with his trauma. 

Not only that, Mickey’s home environment doesn’t hold credence to the idea that Mickey would even see therapy as an option. No doubt he probably thinks it is junk science and he should just toughen up and be a man about it.

Therefore, at the beginning of his journey, Mickey uses violence and avoidance to deal with his trauma. He punches and kicks Ian to try and force him to be afraid of him — in the hopes of protecting him.

Mickey wants to protect Ian from his father as well as himself. He’s afraid that he will never be more than the type of man his father is and that he doesn’t deserve the happiness Ian offers.

This all goes back to Terry’s teachings that men are strong, emotionless beings that don’t have time for silly little love stories. Mickey tries to distance himself from who he is with Ian because being gay isn’t safe for him, or Ian. 

He tries to deny his feelings and push them down, but Ian can see past all that and knows Mickey is only faking it to survive. Unfortunately, Mickey doesn’t talk much about anything that matters.

It’s his strongest defense mechanism and it works wonders for him for a while. However, he can’t squash who he really is inside especially when Ian is still always around. No matter how hard Mickey tries, he will always run back to Ian because he is his solid ground, the one thing he can trust.

While avoidance isn’t necessarily a healthy way to deal with emotional and physical trauma such as Mickey’s, it is the only method Mickey has available to him. That is what makes Mickey’s love story with Ian so special to all the viewers. It shows that two men with trauma in their pasts can still work together to move forward and be happy and healthy.

This makes Mickey a more open and accepting person to the nicer things in life. It’s what allows him to open his heart and mind to the love Ian has to offer him.

Despite his abusive beginnings, Mickey is able to put his whole heart into loving Ian Gallagher, faults and all. He puts aside his trauma time and time again because Ian needs more support with his bipolar disorder.

To show a character that has gone through all the abuse and hatred that Mickey has only to love so freely is refreshing. It gives strength to those of us who have suffered similar traumas and worry that we aren’t worthy or deserving enough for love. 

Mickey is a beacon of hope for so many viewers who may be at the end of their ropes or feeling trapped. This hope is only made stronger when Mickey’s trauma is resurfaced with the return of his father in his life.

Mickey has the opportunity to ignore his father and just move on with his life. However, his father is in need of care and the other Milkoviches are choosing not to do it, so Mickey takes on that responsibility. 

By taking care of the one person who made his life hell, Mickey shows that he has grown into a better person than Terry will ever be. If the roles had been reversed, Terry would’ve left Mickey on the side of the road to rot.

One would think Mickey would still be as closed off and guarded as he used to be because he hasn’t learned the conventional ways to deal with trauma. And yet, his loving relationship with Ian shows that Mickey has grown into the exact opposite. 

As the trauma of his father comes back full force, Mickey relies more heavily on Ian to help support him through it. Instead of pushing Ian away to protect him, Mickey has learned to lean on Ian and gather the strength of mind from the man he loves. 

Ian takes the time to remind Mickey that he is stronger than he thinks and worthy of a happy, stable life filled with love. This really comes into play as Mickey reconciles his past trauma with that of his father’s passing.

If there was ever a moment for Mickey to gain closure on all the abuse he suffered at the hands of his father it is right then. His father is now vulnerable and reliant on Mickey to survive each day.

Instead of letting his father die, Mickey makes the decision to take care of him. This further exacerbates his confusion once his father does pass. All because a part of Mickey hates the man beyond reason and yet a part of him still loves and remains loyal to him.

Mickey is a perfect example of the traumatic struggle when he shows moments of pure sadness and grief as well as anger. There’s complicated emotion behind his voice when he talks to Ian about the pride his father felt in him when he caught a knife being thrown right at him. 

To some, this kind of statement sounds crazy. However, to abuse survivors, it is a moment of recognition and feeling heard. 

Once again, Mickey chose to lean on Ian because he knows he needs the support. He’s no longer afraid to allow himself that level of vulnerability. 

Mickey took his trauma and made a positive life and love story out of it. What could have been a completely tragic story ends up being one of the most hopeful journeys on all of television. 

So many times, we see characters go through trauma and shut down the idea that love is something they can attain. Mickey Milkovich survived physical abuse, rape, prison, and a general childhood of unrest to be married to the man he loves and maintains a happy, healthy marriage.

Yes, Mickey’s LGBT journey is marred by abuse and trauma, but there was always a layer of hope underneath all that. It came in the form of Ian Gallagher, the one person who never let Mickey fall too far into his father’s teachings and forget the man he really is.

Mickey is by no means a conventional comfort character, but his struggles and his journey make it so easy for people to latch onto him. He represents hope for people who have gone through traumas and don’t believe they are worthy enough to love.

 

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