Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Review: Josh’s Ex-Girlfriend is Crazy (Season 3 Episode 4)
Stalking is not a laughing matter. It is not cute or “crazy” — it’s lethal.
According to the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence, “81% of women who were stalked by a current or former husband or cohabitating partner were also physically assaulted by that partner; 31% of women were sexually assaulted. Abusers use stalking to intimidate and control their victims.”
On Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Season 3 Episode 4 “Josh’s Ex-Girlfriend is Crazy,” Rebecca stalks Josh at his home and at his place of work. She is clear about having a homicidal inspiration or intent. And we laugh?
No. Intimate partner violence and stalking are acts of violence — not a punchline.
Rebecca continues along on her episodes-long downward spiral. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend asks the audience to interpret this as a cry for help. It asks us to follow Heather’s wise-beyond-her-Psych-major interpretation that Rebecca can’t get help until she wants it.
Sure. Yes. But that puts Rebecca in only the position of a person who is committing self-harm. Rebecca certainly is harming herself, and the greatest “twist” of the episode is that she self-destructively sleeps with Greg’s dad. This is an act of great self-harm.
Hold on a second, though.
Rebecca’s intense stalking, kidnapping, and knife-wielding threats are the most important aspects of the episode. Rebecca needs to encounter the consequences of her actions.
Rebecca invites Josh’s mom to a carnival under the pretense of a friendly relationship. Rebecca here takes advantage of the fact that Josh does not share the details of Rebecca’s actions with his parents. She knows this because she stalks him and overhears conversations.
This is a very scary set of events that can lead to the death of family members and stalking victims. Josh shields his abuser, Rebecca, by not wanting to admit the pain she is causing him to his family. He just wants to move on.
Rebecca uses that shield to her advantage. But then, in the climactic moment of the carnival scene, it is Rebecca herself who almost perishes.
NO.
Unlike what Crazy Ex-Girlfriend Season 3 Episode 4 “Josh’s Ex-Girlfriend is Crazy” asks us to believe about the “typical revenge movie end,” the plot line is very accurately depicting intimate partner violence that ends in the great bodily harm or death of the stalking victim — in this case, Josh.
The person likely to die or fall into a body-mangling pit here is Josh. Josh Chan needs a restraining order.
Rebecca says that she would never hurt Josh’s mother. What? Rebecca has lied to her, manipulated her, stalked her son, sent poop cupcakes to her son and more. She regularly hurts Mrs. Chan.
Rebecca is stuck in the delusion that the only person she is hurting is herself. That is a lie. Rebecca is a stalker, a predator, and an abuser. Crazy Ex-Girlfriend only calls her crazy.
I will not have respect for Crazy Ex-Girlfriend until it accounts for this massive oversight.
Even if I do continue to laugh at the ridiculousness of Rebecca in full tree gear, zooming out of the bushes to start a swing a-swinging. I may laugh, but I am also pissed.
Please visit the National Coalition Against Domestic Violence for more information and support, including hotlines.
Rachel Bloom expertly portrays the narcissistic and lashing out behavior of a person who is not managing their mental illness.
This is also problematic, though. Rebecca is very realistic. So realistic that it is painful to watch, actually.
I have been in the room when a person, in the pit of their despair, verbally maims the people who offer love because they do not want to face their issues. It is ugly. It is devastating.
Paula’s face when Rebecca lets her venom loose onto her best friend breaks my heart into ten thousand pieces. I have seen that face before.
Then, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend takes what Rebecca spits at her loved ones as truth, has them internalize the meaning, and does not hold her accountable for anything.
I Chan’t take it!
Paula spends more time with her family because Rebecca accuses her of being a bad mom.
Paula is going after her dreams, bettering herself by pursing a law degree, taking steps to save her marriage after infidelity, and has been open with her kids about her abortion to the extent that her son answered the door yelling about it.
Excuse me, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend. I object to you presenting this incredible and complex character, and then attacking her as a bad mom based on tired and hurtful stereotypes of what a “good mom” is.
Many moms, myself included, are faced with the constant judgement of a world that tells us we are failing our kids because we work, because we don’t work, because we breathe, basically. I would ask Crazy Ex-Girlfriend to not ride so gleefully on that judgment train.
Valencia does not necessarily believe the lies Rebecca slings her way, but she does say that she wants to take out her earrings and “yank a pony.” I find this an offensive statement, because it utilizes Latina racial stereotypes.
I am pissed, but not so pissed that I am not still a shipper. The episode has a few wonderful new ship moments.
First, Hector and Heather! What a beautiful, silky-skinned pair. All things yes. The second Hector runs up to Heather, she admits she’s not really looking for Rebecca, because you can’t help someone who doesn’t want it, and Hector nods. I ship it!
I would love to see a WhiJo and Darryl/Heather and Hector double date!
Second, the only time I lol’d this episode is when Nathaniel pops out of the bedroom where he has been trying to figure out the whole Rebecca situation, and Valencia turns her flashlight onto his face.
It is daytime. He keeps talking. Valencia keeps the flashlight on his face the whole time. It is hysterical.
That is all it took, folks. Now, I ship Nathaniel and Valencia.
What did you think of this episode of Crazy Ex-Girlfriend? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!
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Crazy Ex-Girlfriend airs Fridays at 9/8c on The CW.
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Janelle Ureta
Janelle Ureta is equal parts Veronica Mars, Raven Reyes, and Rebecca Bunch, but she aspires to add some Tammy Taylor to the mix. An attorney turned teacher, Janelle believes in the power of a well-told story. She is currently exploring how to tell short stories, 140 characters or less, on twitter. She loves to talk about TV, and right now she can't shut up about Timeless, Dear White People, Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, The 100, or Younger.
2 comments
i know this article is like 4years old. but i was looking for an episode recap and came across this.
this is satire, right?
or are you really for shunning people with mental disabilities? except that you also include “part rebecca bunch” in your bio.. so which part is that? part “crazy”? love seeing people criticize mental disabilities but then also turn around and use them as “cute and quirky personality traits”
they don’t “not hold her accountable for anything”. they literally try and talk to her and help her, but in a supportive way. yaknow. like friends do.
also what about paula?? she literally stalks people all the time as well?? nothing to say about the enabler?? just that she shouldn’t have been called a horrible mom?? not that i agree that she’s a horrible mother, but it seems like a huge oversight to be bagging on someone who is in serious need of professional help, when paula has been encouraging, aiding, and abetting the entire show.
point is, every character has flaws (even precious, in danger josh), even if some are more significant. the show addresses mental disorders/disabilities
and rebecca obviously has it really bad (or did you miss the part where rebecca tries to commit suicide?), and it’s unfair af for you to be ripping into her, or at least her alone.
Hi! Thanks for your thoughts and feedback on my review.
Mental illness/disability is a sensitive issue and I can understand where you are coming from. I do also stand by my criticism of the portrayal of Rebecca’s behavior on this episode, especially the way it is enmeshed with the messaging about mental illness.
The problem here is that Rebecca’s actions are shown as victimless, or that she is the only victim, BECAUSE they are manifestations of her mental illness. The show doesn’t need to, and indeed shouldn’t, vilify Rebecca because of her disability. I do need the show (or did) to recognize that stalking is very serious and dangerous. It’s not funny and it’s not victimless. Rebecca commits several felonies.
You’re right that Paula has also encouraged Rebecca’s behavior and clearly has issues of her own that we have not seen her work through with a therapist. My issue with the portrayal of Paula on this episode is that the message is that Rebecca was right and Paula should be doing more as a mom. It is deflection and the show doesn’t call it out for deflection.
I adore Rebecca Bunch, relate to her, and don’t shun her for any of her actions. That doesn’t mean that the show should be so careless with its portrayal of stalking. It doesn’t mean that Rebecca should be able to act however she wants without accountability or consequence that we as an audience get to see. Having support from her friends is great, but in that conversation Rebecca turns things around on them and gaslights them. That’s not accountability for Rebecca and it’s not the help she needs. She has a disability that is contributing to her very dangerous behavior. She needs to get professional treatment. Luckily, she later does do that with DBT! The show doesn’t connect the dots enough on that issue, in my opinion. It never addresses the stalking, attempted murder, and other serious actions Rebecca took.
I will say that I absolutely love this show and hold it to a very high standard because of how excellent it is. Now that the series is complete, I can see how the entire thing was from Rebecca’s point of view, so of course she doesn’t validate the feelings of the people she hurt. There’s a huge risk to that because Rebecca does some absolutely terrible things that de-center Valencia and Josh Chan. They are two POC characters who deserve to have their emotions and experiences taken seriously (everyone does, but I think Valencia and Josh Chan are most impacted/victimized by her behaviors).
The show could have done both. It could have delivered the intimate and deeply compelling portrayal of Rebecca’s struggle and eventual management of her mental disability AND a deeply compelling portrayal of the consequences of the actions stemming from her untreated disability, stalking, gaslighting, and harassing etc., that her loved ones experienced.
I’m glad you enjoyed the episode and it worked for you!
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