Riverdale Review: Chapter Fifty-Three: Jawbreaker (Season 3 Episode 18)
On Riverdale Season 3 Episode 18, “Chapter Fifty-Three: Jawbreaker,” Alice’s actions cause Betty to question herself. There seems to be no stopping Edgar Evernever or his Farmies, and the “original” Gargoyle King returns.
The creators of Riverdale should heed the advice of the great Coco Chanel. ““Before you leave the house, look in the mirror and take one thing off.” Riverdale needs to get rid of the worthless baubles and stick to the good stuff.
Nobody cares about Archie’s boxing career, or the gym he inexplicably accepts from a man who’s tried to kill him multiple times. We don’t want to see all the wayward Leopold and Loeb juvies, even if it’s just to have the Gargoyle King pick them off one by one.
We’re 18 episodes into season 3, and it’s becoming a chore to separate fact from Fizzle Rock fiction. There’s still a — or should I say “the” — Gargoyle King who is back after several copycats co-opt his (or her) look for their own purposes. If the Gargoyle King didn’t have a vendetta before, he does now that his agenda has been diluted by drug dealers and a homophobic dad.
There’s creepy Kurtz running around spewing G&G speak: prophecies about who the Gargoyle King is coming after next. This game started as a way to use role-playing as mind control and has evolved into an elaborate way to try to kill people. It almost makes you long for the days of the Black Hood who kept it simple.
In addition to cultists, mobsters, and a sociopath with a penchant for elaborate costumes, Riverdale’s got a drug epidemic, and the town’s best hope of eradicating it are a father-son duo. Even worse, Jughead knows who the kingpin is, and FP is too stupid to figure it out.
Where is Gladys when all of these people start suffering from Fizzle Rock psychosis? And while I love the homages and Easter eggs slyly stuck in every episode of Riverdale, I’m pretty sure the resemblance between the random Riverdale student bashing her head against a locker wasn’t an intentional shout out to Bird Box.
Riverdale is so busy trying to outsmart viewers, the show is starting to resemble a dog chasing its own tail. We’re heading back to the place where Betty dons dark wigs and embraces her inner daddy’s girl.
Viewers are supposed to believe that Alice — the same Alice who can clean up a crime scene and dump a dead body — is scared of the daughter who didn’t actually drown her?
It feels as if somebody started writing this Farm storyline without giving much thought on how it will end. Sure, Edgar admits the whole seeing dead people is a sham, and he’s just trying to help people heal their wounds., but no story involving cults ends well for anyone involved.
So, let’s just move it along. This is going nowhere, and Riverdale doesn’t even have the courtesy to do it quickly. This could all be a very elaborate way to bring Hal back into the picture full-time, and we still can’t confirm Edgar and the Farm aren’t related to the Gargoyle King in some capacity.
I’m not convinced Riverdale writers know either.
What did you think of this episode of Riverdale? Share your thoughts in the comments below!
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Riverdale airs Wednesdays at 9/8c on The CW.
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Jennifer Lind-Westbrook
Jennifer has been working as a freelance writer for six years, contributing to BuddyTV, Screen Rant, TVRage, Hidden Remote, Gossip On This, and PopMatters. She prefers binge-watching old episodes of The Office (British and American versions) to long walks on the beach. She's still holding out hope that Happy Endings will get a revival.